com got problem. cant update. yikes.

leaving for penang on thurs. .
to...

• tt person who'll be missing me... its only 5 days. have fun b4 ns. yups.haha.
• my darling cousin.... have fun schooling n u knoe i'll be dead homesick if i receive ur sms when im at penang.so better dont sms me. i'll be fine. trust me. i'll come back in one piece. then can go out together!
• sweets lynn... have fun training.i'll get something for u frm penang. the mats?
• shah...guess u havin fun at langkawi. u promised to bring back penyu for me. muahah.
• my father... (if he happened to read this) thanks for the ringgits. hehe.
• my bro... i knoe u'll miss me like hell.
• syafiah darls...have fun working. miss u to bits. miss u so much u one busy damsel.
• sista de hai....shocked to receive ur sms. thanks so much, u take care too.
• missy fazlin...i'll get back to u asap bt my penang trip. enjoy ur hols.haha..
• everyone else hu'll not be gg to penang... enjoy ur hols. or ur ledang hike or watever. see ya guys soon.

Aku jatuh cinta padamu
Sejak pertama kita bertemu
Dia menghuni relung hati
Kau tak pernah peduli

Tuhan mengapa kau anugerahkan
Cinta yang tak mungkin 'tuk bersatu
Kau yang t'lah lama kucintaI
Ada yang memiliki

Cinta sejati
Tak akan pernah mati
Selalu menghiasi
Ketulusan cinta ini

Jalan hidup tlah membuat kita
Harus senantiasa bersama
Lewati segala suka duka
Tiada cinta bicara

Dan kau selalu
Hanya diam membisu
Meski kaupun tahu
Betapa dalam cintakuOo...yeahhh

Aku jatuh cinta padamu.

Had a tiring week. Monday to wed was well occupied with ogl workshop. Well, I made it through. Yay! Unfortunately, I don really fancy my partner. In fact, I feel rather uncomfortable wif him. Aargh! Nvrtheless, im just gonna try my utmost best to ass my way through the orientation next yr.
Boo. I was rather horribly disappointed that I had to leave early n therefore miss the grand finale of the orientation. Boo. We had training. But training was great although it was rather strenuous and taxing. After training, me and azra went to lot 1 for dinner n saw vans. Haha.
Thursday was stay at home day. I did my hmwks.
Friday. Woke up early for sl meeting n had training. Fun. Love it. But somebody took my shin guard!! Hey! I have a sticker stuck on it! I bet the person hu took my shin guard loves my sticker badly n took my shin guard just so he/she can have the pretty sticker. Dang! Ok. Went to town for dinner. The rest had to go back to sch after tt. Yeah. The keepers bag. After dinner, azra, jess and I went ard window shopping. Haha. It was fun. Jess has a bigggg mouth! It was tiring too. Left town ard 9. I was at yishun mrt statn wen deli rang me n so I went to meet him n waste time! Reached home ard 11 plus. Gosh!
Saturday. Had service learning at darul ma’wa. An orphanage. It was difficult managing them. They somehow refused to cooperate and it was not easy to conduct anything. And I was in charge of ice breakers..aaargh! somebody pls call 911!
Went to town wif gaya after tt. Then, gaya left to meet her fren. So I went off with azra and budi. Budi is a fren of azra. Went for dinner. Talk nonsense and walked ard town aimlessly. Went to youth park and waited for ages for the gig to start. I guess I must have fallen asleep while waiting. So the gig started n budi left to meet the other guys. So left me n aja. After 3 songs, we left n went hm. Tiring!

hey there.
its been 2 yrs since 5th dec 2002
nuthing has changed. i still remember the tears we cried tt day.
we tried to conceal our pain. but we were too weak. it showed.
why are some ppl so ignorant? why dont they care?
or maybe it's just my illusion.
flipping thru the yellowed photographs. where smiley faces were coupled with innocence.
its nature. we shed our innocence slowly as we grow. i cant deny.
but some shed more. a tad too fast. a tad too much.
but i do have faith in Allah. im sure He knows what's best.

wat bt tt person who's deemed to lose his patience?
is it his fault? or is he the victim of the circumstance?
i love him. i love them. do we love each other?
sometimes i pray for something really bad.
she does to. he does to.
i dont think we really mean wat we ask for. we just want the best for all of us
i want the best for the both of them.
i've cried enough tears. we've cried out enough pain.
we got lost along the way. but Allah has always been there to guide us.
He's the Truth. the Light.my Creator.

o ye who believe! persevere in patience and constancy; vie in such perserverance ; strengthen each other; and fear God; that ye may prosper. surah Al-Imran. verse 200

crying wont change anything. feeling betrayed and hurt wont make things any better. i believe that i have to do something. tho i've never been successful since years ago. praying and waiting for Allah's guidance is not enough. but where's my effort? what abt him? what abt them? do they even care to change what's left from what that happened? have they even thought of fixing the broken pieces? im thinking too much. my illusion again. maybe. but im not the type who let fate or destiny direct my life. our lives.

2 yrs have past. nothing has changed. we promised each other. he vowed to nvr repeat what he did. but he nvr did what he said. he broke the promise. too many times. we tried trusting each other. but maybe our ego confused the trust. or are we, just the victims of his, his, his and her weaknesses? are we going to give up. is that it?
maybe i shd stop thinking too much.

i'm a satisfied person. im thankful wif what i have. i'm happy wif myself. but sometimes, i think too much. but again, i'm still a happy person.

and. its my father's burday today. its already the 6th of dec. may Allah bless him wif good health and good well-being. love him no matter what.

hey. heard bout ari. hope she's alrite now. smsed her jus now. yups. she's alrite. Alhamdulillah.
hey darling ari, if u happen to stumble upon this, just wanna say,

YOU'LL STILL BE PRETTY NO MATTER WHAT.

yups.love u.

horla. today is a friday. woke up early to meet darling gaya to mug in sch before hockey. saw subu n vijay. vijay told me tis joke n it was totally not funny. muaha. after tt, we had hockey. yay!

saw the soccer guys. frm vs and aj. mr mohan said tt aj lost. ouch! i was doin my warm up wen i saw my besfren. whoa, he was scoldin the guys, i guess, for not putting enuff effort..

aj soccer go go go~

hockey was alrite. only 90 mins. denise ball hit my shin. ok, so i forgot tt i wasnt wearing the shin guard, so, wen the ball flew 2wards me, i professionally used my leg to stop it.ouch ok. wahaha. i notice tt hockey balls love me. first nizar hit it.on my wrist. next, shahraini hit it. on my cheek.then den, on my leg. wahaha. thanks to Allah tt im not badly injured ah.we had this talk after training. jess did a lot of talkin. well,wat she said is true. im glad we have her. we're not gonna give up. we'll work together as a team. we're gonna achieve victory. Amin.

aj hockey go go go~

after tt, met vanessa n yi ting for the ogl thing. yay! we're done with the identities. n mr chu yong chuen happily took a bus n went hm and didnt help us wif the identities! i left sch n waited for karthik for ages at yishun mrt. gawd! i waited for almost an hr for him. ok, so, he really wasnt kidding wen he said tt he's not good when it comes to gauging the time. met mahen(?) n this other non-ajcian malay guy. ok , so these 2 guys gossiped bt karthik while he was away. ahaha. funny. guys oso gossip. alrite.

tmr, i'll be meeting my favourite cousin for shopping (it was him hu initiated it, not me, so, im not a shopaholic ok. im just accompanying him accompany me go shopping) unless my mum insist tt i go to the wedding wif her. well..watever it is, im just gonna have fun. alrite. gtg. peace outt.

gosh. it has been ages since i last blog. a proper blog that is. and i dunno where to start.
maybe i shd just start frm last sunday.

sunday- me met the rest at bugis for the carnival thingy. saw aisyah blu n nisa. saw khairul. but being the ultra shy person i am (ahem!), i didnt dare to smile at him tho he smiled, but to himself lah. we saw Tomok. wahaha. and the Tomok Junior. wen we were abt to leave the kampong glam compound, i saw Farid. shafiqah's ex. maybe its him, maybe not lah. the carnival was fun. we had this booth to take care of. it was a math game booth. so, lil innocent ones came to play to win some prizes. it was tiring. but definitely great. and i realised one thing, some of the malay lil ones have problems wen it comes to maths.
after tt,

me, aja, za, shah, suli, sairi, ali n adib went to zam zam to eat. yippee!

somethin happened on tt sunday nite. haha. such uncanniness. ?
well, monday, i met the rest of my ogl mates in sch. janet (the super enthu girl), benedict (e nice color blind guy), joy, yong chuen, jason n vanessa. we did the dance. like oh-oh. now tt im typing this, i realise tt i've forgotten the steps. following tt, i went to meet aja. n we went for the training. was alrite. saw rejab. n his hair. muahaha. went off wif gaya to toa payoh to get some stuffs n had dinner. vegetarian food. -puke puke puke-

tuesday- tt's the day we all the mats n minahs aj go jln raye. wahah. so excited. aja's call woke me up..ok, so i was excited, but i was damn tired. buttt. it was fun. all the lame jokes. haha, i sorta blew my top at nizzie in e van. but i apologised oredi, so..yah. its sucha splendid thing to see all of them in traditional costumes. n my besfren wore the same color as me. mak lah's baju is pretty too. aja looked so not aja. too lady-like. so cute. suli wore tudung. she was pretty too. haha. anyways, muni's hs was more like an istana. gorgeous. went to isz's n saw a black cat. its scary ok. oh, and nizar is no more nizzie, but mamad. muahaha. we sang hari raya songs in the van. the van was rather empty, so we had to do somthin to chase the boredom away. so, i sang a malay song to isz, knowing very well he didnt understand like 9 out evry 10 words i howled! i wud like to thank mak lah and utt. thanks ya'll. ya'll are so nice. bleagh. takleh puji utt banyak2 sgt.

wed- cuzin called n said he cant make it. aargh! but its ok anyways. so, asked aja n adib go watch movie. aja went to meet yann or mastura or brudder bear. or saper2 la. so she cant make it. anyhoots, i met fuad at toa payoh to get the file back. then, UNluckily, met vanessa n gaya. they followed me to town lor. kepo women. me went to meet adib n caught the incredibles. cool movie. aft tt jus walk walk ah. saw my aunt n uncle. oh shucks. but nvm. im not guilty. anyway, still dunno wat watch to buy for my father...panic stations! his burfdae is like on monday!!


went hm n got a msg frm cousin. for tt favourite cousin of mine,im here always. forever. come rain or shine. i'll be there for u.

We're friends, that's all we are

And that's all we will become

It's understood

We're only friends

And it's better that way

For everyone concerned

So if you brush against me

When we're walking side by side

I won't wonder what you're thinking

'cause we've got nothing to hide

And i know you didn't mean it that way

'cause we're just friends

We're friends, that's all we are

And that's all we'll ever be

Is friends

And we can split the cheque

But we'll never bring the conversation

Around to you and me

If i see your hand upon me

It's no reason for alarm

I realize you must have seen

Something walking down my arm

And i know you didn't mean it that way

'cause we're just friends

i know, and you know

That this is really the way

That it ought to be

'cause if it was another way

We'd have a lot of trouble

And we'd end up in confusion

And we'd lose a lot of sleep

We both know better than to slip and go

And get ourselves all tangled up again

If we want to keep our peace of mind

We've got to keep a little distance

And just be friends

So i'll try to understand

When i feel your arm around my back

That you really meant to do something else

But somehow you've gotten off the track

'cause i know you didn't mean it that way

'cause we're just friends

I know you didn't mean it that way

i know, you didn't mean it that way

'cause we're just friends