i love this wall!! go find it at far east L1 

trying to act cool. 

after training. 

mixed feelings.
weird happenings.
abnormal situations.
just not wat it is supposed to be.
excitement.
but i dont want to get excited
over things i aint sure abt.

strike.

wat ignorance.

last sat.
had training.very early in the morn. was aight. me, stj and azra joined the guys fwd training. after tt went to cityhall 4 lunch wif jess, charlene, azra and za at sakura. went to peninsular to shop for hockey grip. after that, azra, za and i went to esplanade. chatted for 1 hr plus. so fun. then, we went to carrefour. bought food. ate it next to the fountain n went hm aft tt.

last sun
had madrasah. was alright.many absentees. dunno y. as usual. i did my own thing. did some catchin up wif lynn. yaddah..

last mon.
was late for sch. bleeding hell. had hockey training at delta. it was great. but stomachache like wan to die liddat. after training, headed to hawker ctr for desserts wif ari, shah, za and azra. ok. so, ariana is now siti nurul shahariana shazeaa. haha. ok. we created our imaginary boyfrens wif super old skool names.

my bf : haris delima

ari's bf: dollah kelana

shah's bf: megat kasturi

azra's bf: adam marzuki

za's bf: ..i cant remember!! but got ahmad..

after tt, was hm

last tues.

was alrite. nuthing much happened. oh yeah! bought besse a burfday cake!! so fun. mini celebration.

today.

went to macritchie. trained... oh, my class is playing the angel mortal game. but tauhid changed it to devil ho game. watever lah..haha.

aight. peace outt.

the last post was so dispirited.

thanks Allah. u've given me the strength to overcome my weakness.
im not upset now. i realise tt there's no point feeling sad over what happened. i must be thankful tt im still alive n we're together. life is no bed of roses...wait a min, actually it is! aiyo, hu created that proverb? life IS a bed of roses. the blooms, the deepness of the red and the sweet smelling petals. those are the times when Allah showers us with his love because we've worked really hard for it. n the thorns, the browning stalks, the prick. those are the times when Allah puts a little more stress on us to make us a BETTER person.

-smile brightly-
allah loves me. i love allah too.

let me update ya'll

· last sat, after training, i met cousin Syawal n went to town.chill ard.
· last sun, i coincided w azra in the bus, on ma way to madrasah. met all my
madrasah frens. missed them so much. stupid nuri. made me scared! huda
getting MARRIED???wat? anyways, it was really fun catching up wif them.
misses zaq n fizah so much. raihan waiting for A's results. didnt expect him
to be fr hc.
· last sun, azra smsed n asked me go watch tiger cup final wif her.
i was practically, mentally jumping up and down in total absolute
excitement.
· last sun, met 2404 at eunos mrt. service learning. i love the KIDS AT
DARUL MA'WA!! i wanna visit them again!!they asked me to come back
on hari raya haji weekend, but i cant, sorry syima n asyifa!!
· last sun, i shared a cab with oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead tauhid frm darul ma'wa to kallang.the journey there was oh-so-great. i wasnt in RED!! n tt oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead fren of mine was nice enuff to lend me his red wristband. met the rest there at kallang sttn.

azra, adib, nizar, shak, kim, khairul, zhong loon n the rest.

.they were ALL in RED!! except for nizzie who was bizzarely in green. the match was kick ass ya'll. especially with my oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead fren cheering beside me. wahah. the guys were really vulgar!! ok, so, i succumbed to temptation n started to join in the but*h uproar!! wahaha. funny seh! went hm wif tauhid n khairul.
· last mon. nuthin much la. sch n hockey.
· my chem teacher said i got PRETTY NICE EYES. wahah.
· i've been EATING NON STOP. my classmates know tt!







oh yah. just wanna say this. i HATE guys who are so nice to me!! i'll get disgusted. i don mean tt i like guys who are so mean or whatsoever lah. but i just cant stand being treated like a majestic princess. they make my stomach cringe. i welcome RESPECT but i despise guys who treat me like a little girl who cant stand firm on her own. i like guys who send me hm when we go out together. (smile) but i dont fancy guys hu call my cell n ask me my whereabouts n volunteer to pick me up to send me home. wth!! ahah.

the last post was so dispirited.

thanks Allah. u've given me the strength to overcome my weakness.
im not upset now. i realise tt there's no point feeling sad over what happened. i must be thankful tt im still alive n we're together. life is no bed of roses...wait a min, actually it is! aiyo, hu created that proverb? life IS a bed of roses. the blooms, the deepness of the red and the sweet smelling petals. those are the times when Allah showers us with his love because we've worked really hard for it. n the thorns, the browning stalks, the prick. those are the times when Allah puts a little more stress on us to make us a BETTER person.

-smile brightly-
allah loves me. i love allah too.

let me update ya'll

· last sat, after training, i met cousin Syawal n went to town.chill ard.
· last sun, i coincided w azra in the bus, on ma way to madrasah. met all my
madrasah frens. missed them so much. stupid nuri. made me scared! huda
getting MARRIED???wat? anyways, it was really fun catching up wif them.
misses zaq n fizah so much. raihan waiting for A's results. didnt expect him
to be fr hc.
· last sun, azra smsed n asked me go watch tiger cup final wif her.
i was practically, mentally jumping up and down in total absolute
excitement.
· last sun, met 2404 at eunos mrt. service learning. i love the KIDS AT
DARUL MA'WA!! i wanna visit them again!!they asked me to come back
on hari raya haji weekend, but i cant, sorry syima n asyifa!!
· last sun, i shared a cab with oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead tauhid frm darul ma'wa to kallang.the journey there was oh-so-great. i wasnt in RED!! n tt oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead fren of mine was nice enuff to lend me his red wristband. met the rest there at kallang sttn.

azra, adib, nizar, shak, kim, khairul, zhong loon n the rest.

.they were ALL in RED!! except for nizzie who was bizzarely in green. the match was kick ass ya'll. especially with my oh-so-gorgeous-until-i-wanna drop-dead fren cheering beside me. wahah. the guys were really vulgar!! ok, so, i succumbed to temptation n started to join in the but*h uproar!! wahaha. funny seh! went hm wif tauhid n khairul.
· last mon. nuthin much la. sch n hockey.
· my chem teacher said i got PRETTY NICE EYES. wahah.
· i've been EATING NON STOP. my classmates know tt!







oh yah. just wanna say this. i HATE guys who are so nice to me!! i'll get disgusted. i don mean tt i like guys who are so mean or whatsoever lah. but i just cant stand being treated like a majestic princess. they make my stomach cringe. i welcome RESPECT but i despise guys who treat me like a little girl who cant stand firm on her own. i like guys who send me hm when we go out together. (smile) but i dont fancy guys hu call my cell n ask me my whereabouts n volunteer to pick me up to send me home. wth!! ahah.

im gonna get emo.sori.

aaargh. wat happened? i hate to cry. i cried.i saw the letter. n he didnt care. what? i really dont know what am i to do. why? i want to cry again! why does he find it so hard to forgive? why do they find it so hard to keep their promise? why? why does she let others hurt her and then do something to hurt tt other person in return? why? what should i do if im the victim of this foolishness? what should i say when hear them shout? when should i give up trying to fix what's left from what happened? should i give up? should i even care to try? i'm strong.i believe.


but what about them. will they try to patch back the cracks? or will they just dig a pit out of it?

so what if he's a muslim and prays five times a day? where is the patience? where is the perseverence? where? wth. i'm upset. dissapointed. wth.u, pls dont even care talking bt others' flaws. look at urself. what did u do? what did u not do? u think u dont deserve what u got now? i think u do. sorry. im just upset tt all these had to come fr u. wat happened? im gonna endure everything. but till when? i don't know. should i even bother to take the bleeding time and effort to endure all these shit. im upset. what's the point of talking? u've never listened. what's the point of discussing this shit? u've never even bothered to think bout it. so, u claim u're pressurised. shut up. im sorry.but i really feel tt u cud have done something to prevent this. but u freaking well didnt. i remember very vividly what u said.-let them do what they want, if they get into trouble, don look for me- im upset tt those words came frm u. really upset. u gave up without even trying. im upset. absolutely. pls dont expect miracles from outsiders. u've never tried. i hate to say this. i really hate to. but i'm totally disgusted by your irresponsible attitude. if u think we're sent to this earth so that we can be sent back to Allah happily, u're wrong. very wrong. u shd be thankful that Allah even cares to challenge u. he knows u can take it. he knows u can handle it. but wat the fuck did u do? u gave up. i really hope u wont regret wat u did. its useless saying sorry after wat u did, wat u said. its useless. sorry can never conceal the scars. never. we remember. if u really leave us one day, i'll remember u as a coward. a disgusting coward.

allah.bless us.

had cca carnival today. chieh sheng was incredibly sweet.haha.cousin got tix for us to the match coz someone just decided not to help me get it. watever.doing ok in class. many things have changed. many.anyway, training today was alright. tho it didnt end very well. my slight injury showed so much.den n za said tt i've regressed.tt's terribly bad.nvm, im gg for voluntary trainin wif shah tmr. we gonna make it. we r gonna go mug together aft hockey. Allah pls bless us with the strength to do all these.alright, gtg.

my prayers
oh Allah, forgive my sins and anything i may have done that transgressed my duty. establish my feet firmly and help me against those who resist Faith.

naim n karthik gone for ns. heee. praying that they'll be aight there. cousin missing me. he actually said tt. miss him too. me doing alright in sch now. miss orientation. sadness. but love schooling. lynn darling got some weird soccer match coming up. all the best darl. i knoe u can do it. cheers!

some people..
dont even feel guilty for hurting others.
dont even feel the pain of others tearing because of them.
dont even care to look into the eyes of those who care for them.
dont even care to explain their silence when others are dying to find out.
some people.

ogls. pretty ogls. yay! vesta go~ go~ 

Yikes. Haven updated for years. Ok, exaggeration. Anyways, my new year celebration was a simple one. I was on my way to boonlay to meet the hockeyers when cathy called to inform me bt the new years party shes holding. So I left the hockey and gaya booth early. Was on the train when I saw that ultra cute soccer guy I saw at macritchie tt day. God..
So I headed to Newton. This cathy lives in one big bungalow. Jealous.hees. went there and saw her new boyfren. Check out, its NEW. Haha. Alright, it was ok, we had dinner which was nice coz her father n apparently he new bf are great cooks. Haha. U go gal. Got the right guys at home. So after the dinner, we went out to the pool area. Its sick. Coz its wet. N mentally, there were many ppl there who had the word 'stranger' pasted on their forehead. Haha. Wad de hell. We had a mini countdown. I despise the big ones. I dunno why. Anyhoo, we watched some lame vcds n ended up playing treasure hunt out in the rain. So dumb, haha. my hockey shirt and i. Madness. After tt, we went into the living rm n we prayed for the tsunami victims. It was heart wrenching. I cried. Ok, haris cried too! He’s cathy's bf. Haha. We played a few weird games after tt n my mum smsed me if I was staying over at cathy's place. Of course no. I don't quite fancy staying over at ppl's house. So, haris obviously cant stay over, coz he's a guy and tt's cathy's father rule. Haha. n haris sent me hm. His Subaru lancer seems a lil too expensive for someone simple like him. Haha. But hu cares? He drove me home safely. N sent me to the lift. Lucky cathy.
Aight. I just wanna make an announcement here. I wont be blogging bt my daily lives here anymore. Haha. I'm going back to the old fashion way of penning them down in my diary. Yeps. But I'll be posting excerpts from various songs or poem that will express my feelings at tt point of time. I don't have much audience who read my daily stories to begin with. Haha. Aight. That's all. Happy New Year and May Allah bless all of us. Amin.